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A Sort of An Introduction


About this weblog:

To many people, what's written on these pages may seem unusual. Some things are written to one person, most are written to all. Many people read this journal, in all walks of life. It's like tv or radio: when you turn it on, it's there. I have no real idea who reads it.

Much of it is a journal of thoughts and personal inquiries I undergo throughout my days. These "thoughts" are not necessarily representative of my opinions, but may well reveal what I consider when contemplating a variety of issues. Or just some of those odd thoughts you might have but don't normally say... 

If you think what I say applies to you, then it does, though it probably didn't.



I love thee in the name of Jesus. Let it be known and the words understood that these are offered as a gift of sharing, that we shall know each other and know ourselves by being able to express our true thoughts and passions - unfettered by the limitations of our common world, that love and joy in the hearts of all people may be rekindled like a smoldering fire that comes to life like an act of creation, and that the creation described within shall be realized. These things are offered for the fulfillment of God's plan through my life. Let it be.

Since this is the first one of these, and because some people will think this is very unusual - mainly because people don't usually talk about things like this in public - I thought I should explain a few things about why I'm writing this.

First, because I think it's good for people to compare notes - to realize that everybody has thoughts about things we don't usually talk about, and because of that, a lot of great ideas and feelings don't get shared. I think it's got a lot to do with why relationships end, why goals are not reached, why love is not expressed in this world as a common thing that should easily be shared and acknowledged, but instead seems to have been replaced by the feeling of pressure to get many things done more quickly because the ever-increasing complexity of the world drives us instead of serving us.

Imagine what the world would be like if we realized that respect for a fellow worker is a form of love, that honest business competition is a form of love in that it shows a discipline that generates new ideas and things that serve people, as well as an artist's instinct that is most satisfied by the vigilant quest for excellence - it's that particular kind of perfectionism, when driven by the fun and joy it provides - that truly serves other people, who benefit from those labors.

Of course, there's a great deal of difference between various kinds of love. Not all love is sexual. I'll do a chapter soon called Sex, Love and Marriage that will talk more about all that.

One thing I'm always aware of is how crazy the idea of being the Son of Man seems - to other people and myself. I mean, if I was a psychiatrist and someone walked in and said they thought they might be the Son of Man, I'd seriously question their sanity. After all, in the history of mankind, there is only to be one guy who is actually that, and so the question would naturally be, why him? I thought you'd find it interesting to know that I share the same doubts and curiosity. I don't tell you that to add to the skepticism regarding my credibility.

See, given all of my experiences and my "religious" experiences in particular, as well as my actual name, I have to look at it more like, what if I am and do nothing about it. So, I figure I have to give it all I can - take on the concept of being the Son of Man - in order to actually find out if it's true. Because, if I found out afterward and knew I did not accept the responsibility and do what I was supposed to do, I would find it unbearable.

I find it interesting to notice that this is how I think about it, because it's very much like how we don't do things we feel compelled or move to do because they wouldn't be considered typical or orthodox, but  if we had, we know it would havebeen of benefit or be a success.

The truth is, at this moment, I would be willing to accept that I'm just someone whose psychic skills and abilities have suddenly become more acute and so I'm having premonitions and have attained the ability to alter things in the world through the ability to command change... I could accept that I just tried something on, believing that if it is true then I would be prepared to do the job... I could talk to knowledgeable religious leaders who could actually advise me and guide me (something I'm actually in the process of doing)... or it could easily be that I'm not any of these things but took the time to find out the truth just in case. :} [Sting - If You Love Somebody, Set Them Free]

But the truth is - you know, that feeling deep inside yourself I refer to when I say we all know the truth about ourselves, whether we tell anyone or not - I feel incredibly compelled to press forward and actually do believe there's a high probability that I am, indeed, the Son of Man.

I assure you though, I'll feel a whole lot better after talking to the religious leaders. And if they think I'm crazy, then I'll go see a psychiatrist. :}

But, the other truth is for me, that I've actually seen a great deal of results from things I've done - I won't go into details on that now - as well as realizing that that tinge of doubt in my mind is actually the thing that holds me back from realizing my full potential.

It's very much the difference between thought and thinking. Thought is comprised of all the options and choices available, as well as the possible outcomes when weighing the effects of the potential choices. Thinking is the result, or the action plan or attitude you adopt after weighing the data in the thoughts.

Personally, I believe a little daydreaming is a good thing, just as I really appreciate meditation in whatever form it takes. It gives you a chance to process things yourself, instead of just living your life as in response to the circumstances that seem to force you to live your life and make choices in a certain way. [George Michael - Freedom]

It's that feeling you get when you think to yourself that there just isn't enough time in the day to get everything done, especially paying the bills, grooming the yard, cleaning the house and all of that sort of thing. You just end up thinking you don't have any choice.

One other reason I'm doing this is because I sometimes talk about how I read the Bible as a history book, as a literal translation of God telling us what we need to do, and as the owner's manual. I think it's important to know the difference. And, this is the owner's manual for me. Lets you know what I think about and how I come to the conclusions I do. [Edie Brickell and the New Bohemians - The Wheel]

While I still believe that God is instructing me what to write about, one of the things I keep experiencing is how I'll say or do things, and then, in some way, I become informed that what I'm doing is exactly what the Son of Man would do.

What I'm talking about most is that I did an I Ching reading last night. I never used to take any stock in things like the I Ching until recently, when a friend decided she needed to start doing them on me. I was amused, so I went along. Like a lot of people, I was always curious about stuff like that, but, particularly because my religion said not to indulge in such things, I didn't give it much serious consideration. The fact is, though, I did some computer modeling on readings in the I Ching based on the concept of chaos theory, and discovered that it's actually quite accurate when you learn to interpret it properly.

Last night, it told me to "see the great man". What that means, for me at least, is to read the Bible. So, as always, I grabbed my Bible and said a prayer to be lead to the perfect thing I was supposed to read.

Keep in mind, part of the thing that makes me take the "Son of Man" thing seriously is how I've instinctively done what he's supposed to do. But, I'v eworried that in the stories that I tell, that people would think I was telling all these stories about my experiences because I wanted to impress you or something, instead of the fact that I simply want to share my experiences and personality and thoughts in order to provide an example of what kind of thinking I believe would fulfill God's plan. And to make sure everyone can accept that human beings go through a lot of the same thought processes, like insecurity, doubt and such, and that it's normal and healthy. And, that I am a real person like you, not some deity-like symbol or statue that expects everyone to kiss his feet or ring or something. You know, kind of more like a guy next door.

So, I opened up the Bible, and it was something inserted by the Religious leaders who created the Concordance to my Bible. It preceded the New Testament.

And, it said that in the Bible, Jesus was written about mostly in the context of doing miracles  and such, but it never really said anything to describe Him as a man - what He was like to be around and who He was as a person.

After all this time, and with the institutalization of religious practices, that people only saw Jesus as a symbol - someone we've classified as being a certain way, a certain type - and not only was it untrue, it set Him up as being some guy who was inaccessible, and who did not use His time to engage in personal relationships.

Yet, when we talk about our relationships to God, we call it personal. How can you know someone when you have no idea what they look like, act like and - ultimately, give you the sense that they are a person a lot like you who actually enjoys your company, has interests and desires - just like you. A real person you can actually have a relationship with.

So, it went on to say that the Son of Man would express a great deal more of His personality in order to demonstrate that when God said he made people in His likeness, that it really and truly actually meant that He is a lot like you. He is uncomfortable with the idea that you see Him as a guy who's so different and Holy that he wouldn't want to sit down and play a game of Pinochle with you just for the fun of it. And, like you, He doesn't like being limited to being in a way that is dictated by other people's expectations of Him, although he respects the idea that there are some real expectations to live up to.

Ultimately, I laughed a little, and realized once again that what I was doing was what I'm supposed to be doing. Whether or not I do it well, appropriately and true to fulfilling God's plan remains to be seen. But I'm committed to that goal.

Meanwhile, on a lighter side.

I woke up in a great mood this morning. That feeling like being in love. I'll call that a good thing.

[Cat Stevens - The Wind] I went into my "Don Williams Mode" - a country singer I've always loved. Did the song "I Believe In Love". I love his soft, gentle, flowing sound. Anyway, I wrote a tune that I think I called "I'm Gonna Make You Mine"... something like that. :}

Then started thinking about writing this, and then thinking about how I've been trying to talk some TV people into giving me a daily talk show, so I could sing a song or two and then engage in some very candid, intimate discussions  with people in a way that would allow people to open up their thinking so that they didn't feel like they were limited to acting and being and feeling like what they were forced to be - but instead could generate their own reality or alternative way of thinking that's every bit as much as valid as what we think is "normal". It's like dancing in your chair. It may look a little funny, but it sure feels good, doesn't it?

And, I realized that this column, maybe this one in particular, is a good example of the material you'd find in it. Except, of course, other people would be doing most of the talking. My job would be to provide baseline distinctions to allow people to see different possibilities. Anyway, for those folks, consider it. And, I really don't mean to seem arrogant, but I truly believe I'd be the best person to lead the show. It's just part of what I believe I'm supposed to do. [Sarah McLachlin - Possession]

'Nuff said.

I have many other things I want to get done today. I won't say that I'm going to write weblog material everyday or anything like that, just when I feel I'm supposed to. But when you come here, it'll be here. Makes it all pretty simple.

Right now, I have to finish writing about how to solve the problems between Israel and Palestine. :}

Love ya'll

[Don Williams - Lord, I Hope This Day Is Good]


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